Sunday, March 22, 2009

Oilers v. Wild - Titus 1:10-16

For there are many teams who are rebellious - nothing but goons and cheapshot artists - especially the Wild from Minnesota. Their trap must be beaten because they are ruining attendance figures across the league by playing in ways that they ought not to play all for the sake of selfish gain. Even one of their own prophets has said, "My players are filthy cheaters, tiresome brutes, lazy gluttons." This testimony is true. Therefore, defeat them soundly, so that they will know that our teachings about Yahweh are true. Pay no attention to Canadian Hockey Mythologies or to the prognostications of those who reject the truth. For those who believe, all things are a reason to believe, but to those who are corrupted and do not believe, God will clutterbuck them forever. As for the Wild, both their bodies and consciences are corrupted. They know nothing of God and by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, boorish and unfit for doing anything good.

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